Kerala Fourth Week -Thoughts and Reflections-

As the time to leave draws closer, I keep thinking back to what I felt when I first came here. I'm thankful to Shattik for making me experience this. Truly, I have ways to go before I can really learn to be like everyone else. The majority of the students, if not all, are here with the mindset that once the course is over they don't really have to talk to each other or put up with each other... I wonder if I'm the only naive one that thought that this would be a great chance to get to know people from different places and different backgrounds?

I had fever since yesterday, right now I'm sitting at home working on my Learner's Profile and after that my Material Assignment and the lesson for Monday. There's a dead silence in my apartment. To the suffocating point. I wonder why people cannot look at each other as just people instead of labeling them as so or so. Maybe, if they accepted people for who they are, maybe, just maybe, things would go better for everyone. If there's an argument, isn't it better to just let go of the things and move on instead of holding a grudge and thinking that things can't get better? I wonder if I'm too naive still. Even so, I want to get along with everyone, if you could sacrifice some bit of your ego and just smile at the other person, things should be able to work out. But then, there's the part of the other person that doesn't want to give in... I still don't know how to change that. Mom used to say "you can only control yourself, you cannot control how others think or behave", I see how it works out in the real world. Even though, I've gone through this same experience during my gaming years, still, I still want to believe that if someone is sincere the feelings do get through. Maybe not all the way, maybe not at once, but it does, in time it does. The people I want to reach to, I don't know what sort of hardships they had to go through since they usually don't want to talk about it, but I know that I want to understand them and get to know them better. I still don't know how to reach out to someone who's closed themselves, but maybe if I keep working on it, little by little, maybe we can come to an understanding or maybe they'll learn that not everyone is out there to take advantage of you.

When I leave here, I want to be able to be friends with everyone, be in contact even after we go our own ways, of course it won't be like it is now, but still, maybe something will remain. Not everything is dark and black, maybe somewhere, if you try to search for it long enough, there's still light, there's still hope... sekai wa, tsuteta mon jya nai kara, doryoku sureba, nanikaga kawareru hazu. For sure, if you work hard enough, something could change. For now, I don't want to change my way of thinking, I might be naive and I might be silly for thinking this way, but I still want to believe in the better part of people. One day for sure, people will be able to believe in each other.

Kerala Third Week

Well, I thought I would write daily but in the end the week flew by and I was way too busy to sit down and write. Ramadan started. Between fasting and studying it was hectic to say the least.

I made new friends! Mark, Justin and Chun. They're all from Australia and are really nice people. I hope I get to make more good friends here.

Right now I'm on my way to Guruvayoora via bus. My first time actually taking a bus from a bus stop. Going to a friend's house for iftaar, might stay the night.

The day has been so full of mini personal adventures! I woke up got ready and took a Uber cab to Fort Kochi. Could have been cheaper. Next time I'll try by bus. 

When I got to Fort Kochi I was so happy that I had actually packed my slippers. The pretty sketchers would have been ruined in the mud and sand. While I was sitting on a bench taking in the view, someone came and said "Assalam Alykum". Was pretty surprising for me, then he asked if I was Arabic. Apparently someone who owned a shop and was thinking I was a rich Arab lady cause of abaya. *Shakes my head* in any case he did tell me all about the places I could see. I took an auto rickshaw and went exploring all over Fort Kochi. That was really fun, the driver was trying to get me into shops that are tourist exclusive *=rip off shops*. Apparently he gets a cut every time he brings a tourist to those shops.

After the visit to the Chinese fishing nets, it started raining heavily. I took refuge in a hotel my friend told me about before. It was the most sensational view! From the second floor room, you could see the whole sea out there. The boats and ferries and even the huge cruise like ships. Had to wait there for a long time so I made sure that I got lots of pictures and videos. When I was making video, there was a time when lighting struck somewhere. I saw the flash and heard the sound. It was really frightening. The ground underneath me practically shook when it rumbled. 

I left the hotel when the rain let up, mobile all charged and phone batteries changed. Then I went to the Dutch Palace, historical pictures and artifacts. Somehow I had a deja vu feeling, like back when we first came to Kerala maybe I came here. It all seemed so familiar. They didn't allow picture taking, made me remember the picture my sister Nelly took of the no pictures sign long ago. When coming out I saw a family going in, when I came to the cab driver he and another cab driver were talking about the family saying how shameful, they are from Arab and not fasting and shamelessly eating in public. One driver was Hindu and one was Muslim. They praised me over fasting even when I was travelling. Made me so grateful to my parents for teaching me how to preserve and how to fast even when it's hard to, especially my mom. The very reason I don't skip fast even though when I'm studying and in the afternoon it gets difficult because of the lack of sleep. My body craves caffeine. It takes every ounce of my will power to continue doing it everyday. Today when I was waiting at the hotel for the rain to end, it was so tempting to see the food being made and the drinks being served. The waiter gave me a huge menu, and the items listed there looked so tempting. But I'm glad I preserved. The remark from that auto driver, made me feel so happy and so light. I'm glad I preserved. I'm glad I didn't stop fasting.

I came out of there and went to a close by shop that had many artifacts and ancient items. Next was the police museum, interesting place and I was able to take pictures as well. Again the deja vu feeling was there. I wanted to go to another shop as well but the time for ferry was getting close. Dad's student invited me to iftaar at his place when I was at the hotel. Had to hurry.
The ferry was late but it was amazing. I made a video and took pictures. That was truly a fun ride. I got a window seat and was able to look at the beautiful scenery outside.

I reached Ernakulam and then some nice person helped me get on the bus to Guruvayoor. 

I'll write part two after I'm back home

Part 2:

So it's Sunday, I'm back home. I had the most wonderful weekend.

I stayed the night at my Dad's student's place. We had a wonderful dinner then in the morning a really great sehri, the best I had since I got to Kerala, partly cause I didn't have much time to prepare food for that early, partly cause I would just fall asleep -.-;

In the morning we went to the beach and then the Elephant park, which however, I hated due to the fact that it felt like animal cruelty to me. I know they have their reasons but it still looked painful.

I requested to go to the beach again, and then I was able to actually have fun and enjoy playing in the water. Best.Day.Yet.

I hope next week I'm able to finish all my lessons and projects on time, and then I can go away on Saturday at least. Going out is much like a breather. I feel like I can work hard and focus more on things when I get some space to breathe.

I'll write more again. No time to add pictures right now, I'll do it when I get home and get everything organized.

Birthday in Kerala! I love my classmates!

With my last week's post unfinished and halfway ready to publish, I've been so busy I haven't been able to even finish and publish it, I'm writing this post knowing full well I have a big class to take tomorrow and I should sleep. But I feel like if I don't write this up right now, when I'm feeling the happiness so strongly, I might forget later on, the feeling of today.

Earlier the day one of my friends trued talking to my classmate trying to apparently do a surprise birthday party for me and wanted to talk to one of my classmates, who in turn refused to talk and said he didn't believe in stupid childish things like that (you know who you are >.>). I was feeling quite sad thinking that maybe I'm the only one immature who still thinks doing things for friends like that is fun.
My classmate had a severe toothache all day in class, we were all worried. Today's was a tough class with exams approaching and projects due. So, after having a super sleepy day, where I almost fell asleep thrice in class, I was all but passed out at my laptop, my roommate Manali ran in saying Vinod, the classmate who had a toothache is in severe pain and we should go check up on him. I got up got dressed and stepped out of the room, only to find all my classmates (the ones who live in the same building) were gathered in the room, there was a cake in the middle, and a huge candle next to it. THEY threw me a surprise birthday party T__T... I was so astounded I didn't even know what to say or how to react >.<!! Heck, even now I'm speechless... Vinod said, quite happily "why should I listen to the friend of yours when we were already planning this on our own" THESE PEOPLE ARE NUTS T__T this was such a huge shock in a BIG positive way >.< I'm going to be able to do a great class tomorrow.

Thanks Fatima, Yuvraj, Tania, Creshell, Graeme, Christine, Vinod and THANKS SOOOO Much Manali! The best roommate anyone could ever ask for >.<! You guys made this day the best memory for me in Kerala, when I thought the beach trip would be the most amazing one, you guys gave me something so special, I don't even have enough words to express it. Thank you. So much, so very much.

I can't thank you guys enough. I truly from the bottom of my heart, am happy I came here and met you all wonderful people.

Thanks for the beautiful pictures Fatima and Yuvraj ^0^

Kerala week 2 Sunday.

So far, we had a great day.  Me Tania Creshell and Vinod went grocery shopping while Manali tidied up the place. While on way back it started raining andwe had to run back. Tania stated that it was a good exercise.
I managed to take a lot of pictures on the way. I can't seem to get enough of the blue blue sky and the cloud formation that Vinod insists are UFOs.

We had last night's leftover biryani that I made when we had the dinner party, and chicken curry that Manali made, for lunch. While she was cooking it started raining. The rain here is so unpredictable.  One minute it's sunny, next thing you know it's randomly raining.  Me, Tania and Creshell went on the roof and had fun playing in the rain. I wonder how long it has been since I was able to enjoy playing in the rain like this. It made me remember the time when me and my sisters used to play in therain on the roof. Nostalgic and yet a little sad sort of feeling.

I'm getting really attached to Tania. Last night when me and Vinod were talking we were talking about how its going to be when everyone leaves. Such a depressing thought. I miss being with my family and my daughter. But I will miss the friends I made here and the me right here right now in this time. I'll miss being able to talk to Vinod about life and poetry. I'll miss Manali and her 'galiyan'. I'll miss Tania's carefree yet vulnerable innocence. I'll miss seeing Graeme and Christine looking at each other like they have never seen anything so precious in their lives before. I'll miss Creshell and her do what you like and ignore whoever has a problem with it, nature. I'll miss my terrace and my soothing view. This is my spot. My place to come to when I'm in need of sorting my thoughts. My sanctuary. I'll miss throwing my head back and seeing the ever extending sky and the beautiful cloud formations while listening to Japanese music. I'll miss this place this time the me right here right now. 
I'm writing this from my mobile again. Tomorrow I will get my laptop. The third week will start. The reality of the numbered days is settling in and I'm desperate to save it all so I don't ever forget this.  I'm sitting in the terrace,  in the background 'Monkey Majik's Tada Arigatou' is playing.  I can't help but think about how many precious things I'm gathering here. How thankful I am to my parents for letting me come here and looking after my daughter while I'm not there.
Another airplane is taking off. I take another picture. I don't want to forget this.
Tonight we might eat together again. Maybe not since we all have class in the morning.  But I hope we do. These precious precious days, I wish could go on just a little bit longer.  Ramzaan starts tomorrow.  I'll restrict my food intake from there on. I've been eating too much no no stuff.
Tomorrow is David's class. Nervous. A bit scared.  But I think that it would be a great new experience altogether.  Looking forward to tomorrow.  What new things will I be able to learn about tomorrow, it's exciting to think about it.

I'll get my laptop back tomorrow as well. Maybe then I can record my Tong Hua Japanese cover.
For now, I'm feeling blessed to be alive today again.

Kerala Second Week

Well, originally I wanted to make a daily blog post after I came to Kerala, however, my laptop broke down due to no surge protection in my apartment and I didn't have a laptop. Tomorrow I'll go to buy a new laptop and I have 3 week left here so I will try to take lots of pictures and make a daily post for sure.

Coming to Kerala was for sure the best decision. I'm learning so much here at CILA, I made great friends,  I wake up each day and see the bluest of skies and lush green fields and trees. My roommate Manali makes awesome breakfast and we go to class with our classmates Graeme and Christine.

Until now, Helen has been our group leader/teacher. The 12 of us were divided into groups of 6, half went to Helen and half went to her husband, David. They both have completely different teaching style and we switch to the other teacher in 2 week, which, by the way, will be starting Monday for us. Starting Monday we will be moved to David and the others will come to Helen. 

These pictures were taken by my classmates, mostly by Tania. Will take individual shots and put a proper photo intro for everyone later. I'll however take a picture of the scenery I'm looking at right now and add here.

I'm truly thankful to my parents for letting me come here, this place is like the most wonderful place to live.  I really appreciate it.