Servamp Manga Chapter 10 - 35 ~Thoughts and Reflections~

Updated last night at 2:22 AM my time, I saw it early in the morning, and it's already over... While I was reading the last chapter I had this sickening feeling that I'm gonna have to wait and it was true T__T... since they JUST did a huge update, there's no way they'll update it again so soon T__T...

Servamp so far is going beautifully. I think people should really read this manga. I once again am presented with the many options, to do or not to do. in the end, life is just made out of the choices we make, good or bad, which leads us to where we are in time right here right now. The choices we make for us, the choices someone else's hand forces on us, when I think about it, they're still the choices that we could have chosen not to make.

I wonder, is a child to be blamed for the choice an elder person decides for him? Set up in an atmosphere where saying no is an instant road to endless suffering, physically or mentally, what does a child choose? Don't all choices depend on the people making them? presenting the same choices to two different type of people who grew up in different type of atmosphere, do they still bear the same results? Some choose to run away, some look away, and some follow through, but is it really a choice we make ourselves? How do we know, which choice was the one we truly made, which was the one that we were lead to believe that we're making and wasn't really ours? But then, the person who said "I'll do it" the person who said "I won't" would at the end of the day, still be you. So then who actually made the choice?

My choice of staying home today and finishing reading Servamp instead of attempting to go to gym even though I'm still weak from the week long fever, what exactly would have changed if I had chosen to go? would I have I had a life changing encounter? would I have met people or seen things that would change the way I see things? Or would I have just another day of workout and coming back home to my everyday life? I chose to stay here and read because I strongly felt that this manga has something in it that moves me... People have to live with their choices. I want to live with mine, not the choices I have to make because others want me to to make it, but the ones I make for myself, good or bad, if it's something I chose, then I have to live with it or fix it by myself.

Just because you're grown up doesn't necessarily mean you're wise or mature, I think, growing up means accepting yourself for who you are and moving on.

Few days ago, one of my friends got picked on and badmouthed a lot over the internet just cause he was selected for a big competition and won, where others who were trying to manipulate the people running the contest, didn't.  I thought about it for a long time while he was in the argument with the person, I could't see what they were talking about since it was a private chat, but I thought for a long time, Why? Why does he have to suffer just because he was good enough and worked hard to achieve something a lot of people were working towards. That doesn't really mean the others were bad, it's just he was better than the rest simply put. Does that mean you have to hate him for that? does that make you look better when you try to make him look bad? Don't people see how ugly they appear to the other person when they talk ill about someone just out of spite without putting in the extra effort that someone else did? So what if someone else won? Next time work more, work harder, put in your best effort, and work towards fixing what you lack. I don't think hating someone or trying to degrade someone just because they did better than you, helps you improve anything. People need to move on and realize that only by working on something just as hard, or even harder than the person they envy, can they actually get somewhere.

I wish people would actually try to understand themselves first before trying to lash out at others ._. ...